The girls

This weekend we are in Branson, yes tourist city USA for the silver hairs of America, or at least I thought. The truth is Branson is really pretty and caters to all ages. There is great food, amazing shopping, shows and theaters on ever corner, and beautiful landscapes. I am also having so much fun hanging out with my sister and my mom. The girls are so great playing together, Kaylin of course is the mother hen and Alyssa just does what she wants.
The drive was almost uneventful except for a slight spin out and getting a little lost in Springdale. But on a brighter note, the girls did great and my mom is an amazing long distance driver, I was shocked. Today I am going to take pictures of Branson to post.
See all in a few days!!!

My baby

Last week officially marked the end of Alyssa being a baby with the removal of the grandest sign of babiness, her crib. Our dear Friends are having their second baby next month and so the crib has been passed on. It is bittersweet seeing it go. I know she is big enough and ready but on the sad side it means my baby girl is growing up and their is nothing I can do to stop it, I'll blink and she'll be going to college, CRY, CRY! Any Way, she loves her bed and is doing so good staying in bed and not playing. She is such a great kids, she just goes with the flow.

What a big girl!

All tucked in ready for nighty-night, isn't she so adorable?

I told her, "close your eyes." So she covered them.

It so so strange how fast life flies by, I just brought her home from the hospital and now there is nothing in my house to even signify that a baby lives her and that is because I don't have babies but little girls. That is a sad realization for me because it means having babies is done for me, ; on the brighter side it means my girls are getting bigger and more independent and are able o do more and that is more fun!! So if I must say good bye to babies I do because I am excited about the fun things to come as I watch them learn and grow. Forgive me if I do have moments of sadness as I watch this process, I've been told that is normal.

Update

By the way, yesterday marked on eweek with no accidendts. as a reward kaylin got the Tinker Bell Polly Pockets. YEAH me, I mean YEAH Kaylin!!

Potty Training, Who's it Really Training?

A mom disclaimer, this mom talk may not be appreciated by those who have not yet embarked on this journey; or it may be hilarious, or it may make you never want to go on this journey ( I hope not, it is worth it)! Having said that, Kaylin has been potty trained for over 2 1/2 years, but has always slept in pull-ups keeping them filled to the brim every night, with a dry night not even in sight. I kept thinking,"eventually she will stay dry and out grow this." Eventually kept not coming and she is going to be five and I began to fear this may require intervention and the "on her own part" may never happen. The reality is as long as she is in a pull-up her body thinks she has a diaper on and therefore will never stay dry. So knowing me, I made a plan to get her out of the pull-ups. The plan you see, was three fold; 1. to get her going to the bathroom more during the day, every other hour, try remembering that! 2. cut the drinks off at 6:00pm sharp, 3. and the kicker, get her up for one last potty time before I go to bed, staying up until 11:00pm. most nights, which is rough most nights. The irony is, every morning she gets rewarded for staying dry, but really what did she do to earn it, I told her to go potty, I got her up at 11:00 every night, I cut the drinks off, and she gets rewarded, where is my reward? Why is the child rewarded for the mother's efforts? In a perfect world this all seems a little unfair. You may be thinking way to go Tracy you are working so hard and you are not getting rewarded every morning, you deserve a treat. And I would be saying, "you are right, I do deserve a reward." But, this is not a perfect world, and my biggest reward every morning is that I didn't have to get up to change sheets, I get to sleep all night. My reward is seeing my daughter succeed and feel proud of her self for staying dry. So maybe she really isn't doing any thing right now to stay dry and all the dryness comes from my efforts, but one day it will be all her effort that keeps her dry and the confidence I am giving her now will make that possible. So I say to my self, you are dong the work now to empower your daughter to do it in the future. Now if I could just get Alyssa potty trained I won't have to buy any more diapers. With any luck and little planing, which I am the master at :), she will totally potty trained by January. Just imagine it, in 5 months I could be diaper and pull-up free. What will I do with the extra money every month, but don't you worry, Stefan will finally get more meat!!

For a Reason

WOW I have the best friends ever! This past week has been my own little pity party (see the above post) and my friends left the greatest comments that reminded me of truth I needed to hear and that they care about and love me, awe how sweet! On with today. I am a firm believer that is a reason for everything that happens. Perhaps being alone is for a reason, perhaps all my human excuses for being to busy for God are busy for a reason, perhaps this is my chance to take my loneliness and let God fill the void. I am guilty of running to so many other things before God and for the time being all those things (IE. people) seem to all be taken away. This whole thought process isn't that this happened to me but that it happened for me, to draw near to God. So many times I hear that still voice and I ignore it or make excuses to respond later. Well, we will see where this goes and what choices I make. I hope I make the right choices and take advantage of htis time and respond to God and stop putting Him off.

Change, isn't it GRAND!

Lately it feels like so many things in my life are chaining, being in school every night to being out of school, Stefan not working much to working most evenings and Saturdays, summer time (no school for Kaylyn), and on and on. I like to think I adapt to change well but truth be told I don't, I get very lonely and depressed. I always expect it won't be so bad and the I am "pleasantly" surprised by the fact that it is harder than expected. The hardest change I am currently having to adapt to is my friend going to work full time. Don't get me wrong, I am so excited for her and proud of her for being brave and starting something new. I know this is a great thing for her and her family. With that being said, I miss being able to call her when ever I want and talk for an hour or two, I miss being able to do things during the day, although that has been rare lately due to schedules, and I will miss picking our girls up from school together. Change sucks but the truth is God never promises that life will stay the same and that things won't change, it is inevitable and how you handle it is important. I guess for me I need to learn how to better handle change. How that looks I don't know, I didn't say I had all the answers, I just know I need to handle it better. Maybe that means I need a more positive out look or, and this is gut level honesty, I need to make it less about me (OUCH). The truth is I much to often make it about me when really it isn't about me that much. "Get over your self Tracy!" I should tell my self that often. Change is a part of life and I need to learn to go with it and accept it rather than fighting it. Life is changing and I don't quite like it yet, I know I will adjust and it will seem like it has always been this way but until then I guess I am morning the loss of certain things. Forgive me for my pity party, but sometimes we all need to get it out to deal with it and move on, so maybe now I can get over it and move on. Wish me luck! If you know me at all you know the battle I am fighting and that I need good luck.

Life is changing and I don't quite like it yet, I know I will adjust and it will seem like it has always been this way but until then I guess I am morning the loss of certain things. Forgive me for my pity party, but sometimes we all need to get it out to deal with it and move on, so maybe now I can get over it and move on. Wish me luck! If you know me at all you know the battle I am fighting and that I need good luck.

Super Mom

Ok I got to put a disclamer out there so there is no confusion about by signature name. If you are any thing like me, and I think on some level all moms are, we need positive affirmation. In a world that says you're not good enough, be this, do this, it is hard to feel like you are a good mom. To remind myself and all the other super moms out there I sign my post, By "Super Mom." So you see I am not overly confident in myself, at least in this area, or an ego maniac; I am just trying to remind myself in a simple way that I am a SUPER MOM!

The motherload

OK, so I have been informed by more than one person, Cindy & kareah, that I need more pics, well hang on a second because I just figured it out so get ready for the mother load. By the way for some nameless person (Cindy) who says she (Cindy) can't remember what my kids look like, here you go, now you know who your nieces are! For the rest of you who have waited patiently for me to join the 21st century and email pics, and for those of you who really don't care here they are!!!!

Here we are at Daisy and Erik's wedding, it was so

It was sooooo sweet to see Stefan dancing with Kaylin!!

Alyssa had a blast doing what she does best EAT!!

Here are some 4th of July pics.

For those of you who have missed the last few months, sorry but to post that many pics. I would never leave the computer and would shut down the Blogger site. So you will get a fresh start from here. Any way, even I missed the last month, Anatomy was my life. By the way for those who don't know by some miracle I acctually got an A YEAH!!!!

It got to late to do fire works on the Fourth so the next night after school we did sparklers in the driveway in the rain.

First Posting

Well, here we go again at attempt # 2 at a blog. Hopefully I will be good at this and post regularly! stay in touch so you see all the lastest pics and read all the latest happenings.